So who would believe it! I have 41 followers. No book sales though. Still Fifty Shades was not erected in a day.

Nothing else to report except one thing.

We all know that we should be washing hands regularly for at least 20 seconds and two verses of a certain song are suggested. It has come to my attention though that not everyone knows the correct words. This is essential for the full 20 seconds to elapse, so here they are.

Happy birthday to you, squashed tomatoes and stew, rub your belly in jelly, happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday to you, I went to the zoo, I saw a fat monkey and I thought it was you.

You are allowed to replace the last word depending on who you happen to be with at the time – so you don’t offend and make them breach the two metre rule when they sock you in the mouth.