I finished writing ‘The Puzzle’ in May 2021 and have been trying to find an agent or publisher since. Fifty rejections – or in the majority of cases just silences – later and I entered it in the Readers’ Favorite 2023 Competition for an entry price of $119. The results were out today and whilst I was allocated one of the prizes available for just entering (a free beta read), my writing did not win. There was a publishing contract up for grabs and it was my last hope. I cannot self-publish again because I don’t have the money to even get a cover done. Therefore, I don’t think ‘The Puzzle’ will see the light of day.

I didn’t think I could feel worse. Since at least February I have been in a zombie like state, just doing what I need to. Work obviously, I need to be able to stay on top of that. I keep up on The Wordle League because people are depending on me. I have been doing nothing else though – other than gambling.

So things fantastically low already, but I think maybe that the faint faint hope of winning a contract was aflicker somewhere deep inside. Now that has gone and I feel further deflated if possible.

There is no work this week or next because this is my holiday. The Wordle League is on a break too. Ergo, I am not doing anything. A waste of two weeks just like my entire life has been wasted.